Friday, October 30, 2009

Mr. Clarity's favorite Steven Wright jokes

Here are my top ten favorite Steven Wright jokes:

What’s another word for “thesaurus”?

I went to a general store but they wouldn’t let me buy anything

My neighbor has a circular driveway. He can’t get out.

Whenever I think of the past, it brings back so many memories.

If you’re not part of the solution, you’re part of the precipitate.

Right now I’m having amnesia and deja vu at the same time. I think I’ve forgotten this before.

I went down the street to the 24-hour grocery. When I got there, the guy was locking the front door. I said, “Hey, the sign says you’re open 24 hours.” He said, “Yes, but not in a row.”

I went to a restaurant that serves “breakfast at any time.” So I ordered French toast during the Renaissance.

You can’t have everything. Where would you put it?

It’s a small world, but I wouldn’t want to have to paint it.

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